When we think about weddings, joyous images of white dresses, cakes and doves come to mind. Weddings are a time of celebration and union, and they are universally thought of as a positive thing. But what if one or both of the people taking vows is struggling with addiction. This changes the picture perfect idea we have in our minds to something darker and more troubled. To many of us, signs of addiction in a romantic partner would be an automatic indication of the necessity of postponing plans of matrimony, if not severing them completely. But to others, the signs of addiction are either not taken seriously or are swept under the rug completely, and addiction enters the marriage.
When addiction and marriage exist within a relationship, it quickly goes from something that was left unaddressed to something that plays a major part in the marriage, and not for the better. Typically, the non-addicted spouse did not address the problem because they were not aware of a healthy way to handle it or they did not realize the extent of the problem. It is very important in a serious relationship to know when and how to address problems and conflicts, as well as to know the signs of addiction so one can assess addictive tendencies in their fiance prior to marriage. It is also possible for both partners to be addicts, either to the other’s knowledge or not. This can be even unhealthier, as neither partner will want to be held accountable for their addictive behavior.
When it comes to addiction and tying the knot, there is only one healthy option: tackle the problem before saying the vows. A brand new marriage is challenging enough without bringing a major mental health or behavioral problem into it. Addiction can only hurt a new marriage, never help it. When someone is addicted to a behavior or a substance, they place it at the highest level of priority. The addiction gets more energy, attention and thought than any other aspect of their life, including their new spouse. This will inevitably become hurtful and damaging to the relationship, and will create a wedge between the newlyweds. If you or someone you know is engaged to be married and struggling with addiction, it is wise to bring the addiction under control and end it prior to getting married, for the health of the relationship.